So my last post gave you a bunch of information, right? I'm here in New York, on the Upper West Side (in a neighborhood affectionately known as SoHa, because it's north of 100th Street and south of Harlem), living in an apartment with a couple of kittens that were rescued from a feral colony. I've got all my furniture, moved some stuff from Minnesota, and am all set. Well, kind of...
I'm going to be 50 years old in May. Yes, I am freaking out a little about that. But until May 1, I lived almost my entire life in Minnesota. I was involved in a lot of stuff there. And it was easy to get involved in stuff there. Join a church, get involved with the faith community. Have some kids, get involved with their lives and growing up and their activities. Have all your friends that you've known all your life near you, so if you really have to see someone, it's a phone call asking "mind if I stop over?" Volunteer in things that interest you. Do activities that interest you. Yes, Minnesota (and, especially the Twin Cities) is easy to do all of those things.
New York? Not so much. You want to join a church and a faith community? I'm Roman Catholic. There are 79 Roman Catholic parishes (according to wikipedia) on Manhattan alone. Have kids? Nope, they're back in Minnesota and I'm trying (and most of the time failing) to stay involved in their lives from a distance. But they're older now, and their activities are, well, their activities. Friends? Yeah, they're back in Minnesota, too. I have some work friends here in New York. Only one lives in Manhattan. Volunteer? You have no idea how many places you can volunteer, how many causes, how much need is there. It's intimidating and hard to find that place "to start". I love to scuba dive, am a certified PADI dive professional. It's a good thing there are only 3 PADI dive shops on the island (one isn't very professional, one I haven't talked with, and one that is fantastically awesome that I'm 'working' with now, Empire Divers). It ain't easy, folks.
I went from being a decent sized fish in a medium sized lake to being a guppy in the ocean. I've stayed here a lot over the last seven years, spending about a third of my time here. Even "lived" with a friend (yes, the same one mentioned above) for two and a half of those years. I thought I knew the city. And, in a way, I did. I knew the places to eat, the places to shop (usually), how to get around, and thought I could even detect the 'mood' of the city. But none of that prepared me to actually LIVE here.
I'll be writing more (and more and more and more) as the days go by. On nights like tonight, when I actually got home at a reasonable hour, I may even have more than one post. I hope that doesn't upset you. Because "Riding the #8 Train" needs some set up, too. And, right now, I'm going through the process (sometimes joyful, sometimes painful) of getting that train built. One of these days, we'll hopefully to get to see what it looks like!
If it makes you feel any better, moving across the river right by where I was practically living with my (now) in-laws is a completely different world although I thought I knew the place well.
ReplyDeleteGranted, a lot has changed since I jumped the Mississippi: the whole living on my own thing, marriage, and having our two pets...
But there are the things I didn't notice. In a two block radius, I have a gas station, grocery store, bus stop (train 8 blocks away), library, post office (though crappy), a bank, and a hardware store. It has everything I need (except a Starbucks, which I am jealous that you have so close).
But surprisingly a lot has changed: the banks went into lockdown after someone got shot just up the road from me, and I've learned to avoid going too far south where the other shooting took place this spring.
I've changed jobs, gone through a lot of financial stress, and I'm finally starting to understand myself as an adult. In a way, I see you going through a similar change. We're both far more humble than we were two and a half years ago, and I read the letter you sent us in July 2009 again this week. It made me tear up a little.
As much as things have changed, you are right: the distance gets hard. But I know that we'll get through it just fine. You aren't failing. Even with the internal struggles you have, just have a little faith (in us, in God, in yourself). We're a lot more patient than you realize (we have to be - you know how our family can be), and we love you more than you know.
((And for those who don't know, I'm Katie: the younger daughter and middle of three.))
I love you!